Gramp

So I woke up this morning after not being able to sleep very well. I had my grandparents on my mind all night long. I just really felt that I needed to go visit. So I asked Lisa if she would mind going down with me. We were just trying to decide if we should call Gram when she called us. We asked if we could come down and she said she would work on getting us in for the chateau Labor Day Picnic. We went and had a great time at the picnic.
When we got back to the room, Andy was on the john and couldn't get up. I don't know if he was ever even conscious while we were there. Hope tried calling everywhere looking for some one to help move him onto the bed. While she was doing that, Lisa and I went in and kept him company. We got him a blanket and covered him and rubbed his back. He was moving his jaw everytime we talked with him and I heard the rasp of his breathing every once in a while. We just kept talking to him. All the while the look in his eyes was just retreating. He was getting further and further away. Hope called the non emergency number for the fire department. I turned to Lisa and said "he's Dying, right here, we can't wait for them." So Lisa and I pick him up and moved him to the bed. We hurriedly arranged him and got him dressed. I closed his eyes and jaw. Hope brought in a clean sheet we put it over him and helped him look a little more dignified. In Honesty I think he died somewhere around the time that we wer moving him. When the firemen came they tried for a while to revive him. Hope was adamant that she had a DNR, but the one she had on her fridge for him wasn't legally binding somehow. So he was innovated for about half an hour. We were all in the livingroom while they worked on gramp in the bedroom. At one point, Gram started to cry, but she is so stoic she said, "there will be lots of time for tears later, right now there are things we need to do."
So, the chaplain came and announced that gramp had passed. He explained that since he had passed at home, he would have to stay there until the coroner came, and then the funeral home could pick him up later. No definite timeline since today was a holiday. We prayed together. Lisa had gone to the health center to find the authentic DNR form. Gram and I talked together a bit while the chaplain went to speak to the paramedics who had arrived with a gurney. As we talked the chaplain came in and said, "Mrs H. There has been a change." Andy's heart had started beating after they had stopped resuscitating him. So they swooshed him off to the hospital and Lisa rode in the ambulance.
I helped Gram collect the things she needed to take to the hospital. I also made the bed, and just kind of did some general straightening things in an attempt to make the room seam just a little less empty. Not much you can do for that.
So I drove to the hospital, Gram led the way. We got there and were escorted back to the internal waiting area where they told us that Gramp was announced dead.
The social worker came in and gram astounded her with her poise and organization. The entire Funeral was organized. All the papers were in order and gram wanted the people who needed to be phoned called right away.
When we got back to the condo, Gram and I sat talking for a few minutes. She really wanted Lisa to stay with her for the night. Lisa is such an easy traveler all she needed was a pair of earplugs.
Nothing seams real yet. I closed his eyes. I heard his last breath, I flushed the toilet for him. Why is this not real???
All I can think to say is that I am so glad I went today to visit my Grandmother and my Grandfather. I am so honored to have been at his passing. I walked on hallowed ground today, with barefeet.