Family, funeral, and fun

It's a good thing I spent a little time after Lisa got here to pick up our construction mess.

Dad arrived Wednesday morning. We basically spent the day hanging out waiting for Tia to arrive. Which we did-later. Poor dad can hardly move. His hips are completely gone and because of other health issues, cannot have replacement surgery.

Thursday we all went to the beach and had a great time. The water was very churning and cold, but swim we did. Dad got tumbled by a wave and all Tia saw of him was first the bottoms of his feet, next butt and then shoulders and head. He came up smiling and saying now he knew how clothes in a washing machine feel.

We kept out of the rest of the families way, since dad and Gram are not close. In fact, dad and the rest of his family are not close. Just a whole lot of resentment and pride.

We went out to dinner to our favorite Chinese restaurant. We had Beijing duck, our favorite and some other favorites. It was great and a whole lot of fun.

Lisa and Tia slept in the same room. We got a double height air mattress for dad and he slept in my sewing room.

At night I couldn't sleep so I started baking and making a treasure chest cake as promised for my cousin Adams daughter Paloma. She turned 4 on Saturday. The cutest little girl!

To Friday finally. We drove down to San Marcos and met Adam at the Mortuary. He looked handsome in his suit. The rest of the family arrived shortly and we all stood in the parking lot and talked. Adam met dad for the first time and Tia met Uncle Frank and Linda for the first time. Tia and Adam are both in their 30's.

Extended family was not invited. Hope does not like a large group, even at her wedding it was a very limited party. She and mom do not get along. She is very choosing about who she likes to be part of things and so even Adams wife Lexi and mother were not invited. (This is such a difficult thing to deal with as I am so much the reverse of this. I want everyone to come.)

In attendance of the funeral were: Hope, Aunt Jane and Don, Uncle Frank and Linda, Cousin Adam, my Dad, Tia, Lisa, JohnE, and myself.

As we came in the organ was playing. It was such a morbid and ooky organ tone I almost started laughing. It sounded like something on a scary movie. But as I sat I started to feel really sad. Everyone was crying. The preacher man Eric, who was the chaplain at Andy's passing was the speaker. He gave some simple prayers and then Frank gave the eulogy. Frank also spoke about Gramp's love of food and cooking, about how he gave so freely of himself. Adam spoke about the time that he went across the country with "grump and dump." Dad said his father's eulogy and told some wartime stories about gramp. Gram looked at her watch and made a comment that it didn't happen. (Gram called tonight and thanked me again for all I did. She asked about dad liking to be here, and said that she really enjoyed what dad said. "wasn't that neat?" I told her I could just hear the bedtime stories in those words. She said that it all "must be true.")He also read the poem that starts "pappy mine pappy," to which there was not a dry eye in the house.
I spoke and am not entirely sure what I said. It all kind of tumbled out. I know I said that a lot of prayers were answered by Lisa and my being there at the time of gramps passing. I also talked about coming to visit and ordering pizza and gramp eating 3 pieces. And how when I was 15 he would get up early to pick oranges, and make orange juice for us. Then Eric stood again and closed the service.

We all went to lunch in the neville room at the chateau. Dad sat next to gram and Frank. It was the first time dad and Frank had seen each other in almost 40 years. All in all, things went very smoothly.

Saturday, JE and I took dad to the airport rather early in the morning. Later we all went to Paloma's party. It was so much fun and such a nice park. It was so fun to be there. Adam and Lexi have such nice friends and are such good people themselves. We are lucky to live so close and to have crossed that bridge into friendship.
Later we drove Lisa and Tia to the airport.
JohnE and I went to bed almost immediately and didn't get up until 1 in the afternoon. I am still so tired. It has been quite a roller-coaster.